Embrace.

So I'm the only person in my family who has curly hair and who knows how to handle curly hair. It wasn't until just the past year that I really learned how to properly care for my curly hair. The reason why I'm sharing that I am the only one in my family who has curly hair is because people who don't have experience with curly hair don't understand how to style it.

Awkward teenage hair.

It wasn't until I actually did some online research that I realized that I wasn't the only one who had some issues trying to figure out their hair. There is even a quiz that you can take to determine which curl type that you have! I'm either 2c or 3a..maybe a mix of both. You can take the test for yourself here.

Growing up I wanted to have straight hair like everyone in my family. I wanted to be able to wash my hair, brush it, blow-dry or air dry my hair and wear it down and have it be shiny and smooth. That was not the case, if I apply direct heat to my hair, my hair puffs up like a frizzy nightmare. So I never attempted to do anything special with my hair. I would throw my hair up in a ponytail or put some gel in it and let it naturally dry, resulting in hard and crunchy curls that stuck to my head. That was until I discovered what I thought was the best invention ever... a ceramic hair straightener!

I can still remember the first time that I swiped a section of my curly hair through the plates of a hair straightener, it was a Sunday, Superbowl Sunday to be exact, 2005. My mother had purchased a ceramic hair straightener and I never bothered attempting to use it because I thought at the time nothing could smooth my hair out, a few friends of mine who also have curly hair had said that it really worked, so I gave it a try. I could have cried, I may have cried... My hair felt like silk, my hair felt "normal"! I fell in love and I was obsessed! I just couldn't believe that I had straight hair! 

The beginning of killing my hair!

So as you can imagine, I started to straighten my hair daily because my hair isn't thick like most people who have curly hair, a lot of people can get away with straightening their hair every other day and only washing their hair once or twice a week. I was washing my hair daily and straightening it daily because my hair would get oily and dirty pretty quickly. I noticed over time that my hair had started to thin out a bit and when I tried to wear my hair natural my curls weren't as defined, they were frizzy and damaged looking. So I just continued to straighten my hair or throw my hair up in a tie if I let it dry natural. I started to dye my hair with high level developers to really lift my natural dark blonde color to a light blonde color and that's when the real damage started to develop.

Awesome color, but super damaged.

Since I started damaging my hair I started doing short hair cuts every year or so to cut off the most damaged parts of my hair that looked like straight up hay. Then I would go through phases of just growing my natural color out and avoiding the hair straightener. I would dye my hair a color closest to my natural color, which looked most like my roots and go about 3 months without coloring it and then I'd get bored and want super blonde and straight hair, so I'd dye it again and start applying more high lift colors.

 Cut and dyed, curling iron curls because my hair was damaged from flat ironing.

 You can see the damage here and the color fading out of my hair.

Super chop (my 2nd professional haircut) I had dyed my hair with Wella Color Charm 1001 with 40 volume developer a day before I got it cut. My hair was so damaged and melted that I put my hair up in a ponytail to hide the ends and when the stylist went to wash my hair before the cut, she could barely run her fingers through my hair and she underestimated my hair texture and had to charge me extra for my hair thickness and curl pattern, it was too difficult for her to style. 

  Getting ready to straighten and growing my hair out.

Another big chop and dye.

Another big chop and dye.

Straightening and dying again. 

My actually awesome color and style, this was like a month or so before I decided to start taking care of my hair. I had used a hot air brush to dry my hair and then I kinda straightened it with an instyler 2 in 1 straightener and curler.

I had found a less damaging way to blow out my hair. I started to use a Conair hot air brush that you can purchase here. Conair came out with another model that is way different than the hot air brush that I linked, it looks similar, but it doesn't have the same motor. I don't think that they make the one that I like anymore, but you can purchase it on Amazon. I wouldn't ever go back to blowing my hair out without this amazing device. Using the hot air brush is like styling and drying at the same time. It's an awesome awesome product. Before I started to follow a gentler hair routine, I would always dry my hair with the tool. It's definitely less damaging than blow drying and then going over your hair with a straightener. My hair wasn't as damaged as it was when I was flat ironing it, but it was damaged and my curl pattern was completely lost.

So last year or so I tried to wear my hair in its natural state. So I used the same products that I used when I was younger, when my hair was super curly and had awesome spirals that I didn't really know how to style. I washed my hair and applied gel and some leave in conditioner, as I had done everyday of my life when I was younger. When my hair dried, there  was absolutely no curl pattern. My hair was a frizzy dead end mess. So I did a simple Google search that changed everything. I googled "how to get my curls back". The search resulted in a zillion pages about curly girls, I had no idea there was so many people out there who were discussing their curly hair. One term that kept on popping up was "The Curly Girl Method".

So I read up on this "Curly Girl Method". A lot of people who have had the same issues with their hair as me follow this method. I decided to try it. Most of the stuff is just common sense stuff that I didn't really think of, sulfate free shampoos, no silicones. This is how Google describes the curly girl method.

"The curly girl method was invented by Lorraine Massey and it is a method in which you go SHAMPOO FREE to give your curls some ultra moisture. Instead of shampooing you cowash (wash your scalp with conditioner) and you condition and style your hair with silicone free and sulfate free products."

The super detailed site that I first started reading is here. I started purchasing A LOT of curly girl method approved products and I've discovered some amazing keepers and some not so great products for my hair. Some of the products are very expensive, but awesome, like the devacurl line. You can do the whole method pretty cheap, it just takes a while to figure out what works for you. At first I was cowashing my hair with suave naturals conditioner and then conditioning it with GVP Conditioning Balm and styling it with Kinky Curly Knot Today and Ouidad gel. I've had some trial and error as far as styling. When I first started styling I was "plopping" my hair because most all curly girls do it, I thought this was working out for me, but no haha. Now what I do isn't what most do, but it works for me. I wash my hair with my hair pulled forward on top of my face (if that makes sense) and then I condition and rinse. I squeeze out the excess water and I take a t-shirt and I wrap my hair up with my hair still laying upside down to soak up a bit more water. I then put a leave in conditioner in my hair and I run it through my hair with my fingers. Then I brush my hair back with a tangle free brush and I part my hair and smooth it out. I then add gel, this morning I used curl keeper. Then I twirl sections of my hair with my finger, so I can enhance and define my curls and I let my hair air dry. Once my hair is dry I crunch my hair out and fluff it up a bit and then I'm done. 

This is plopping and I failed at it....

I still have no idea what I'm doing wrong when it comes to plopping. 

I stayed away from hair dye for a while, like it says to and I stopped straightening completely, I've only blown my hair out with that conair hot air brush 3 times in almost a year. It's so much easier to have healthier hair that I don't have to worry about looking dead and frizzy if I let it dry natural. I did start dying my hair blonde again, but I'm learning different ways to prepare for a damaging dye and I often use hair masks, some that I make myself and then a lot that I purchase. I use a hair dryer with a diffuser a lot, which is great if you want to dry your hair quickish, I had purchased one forever ago, but I had no idea how to use it. So I'm getting there. I'm still a long ways from having great hair. I'm trying to embrace my natural hair. 

Yay hair. Everything is curly girl method approved besides the purple shampoo.

What's in my shower.

Products that I currently use. I put the castor oil, which is amazing by the way, in my hair about 10 minutes before I shower and I rub my scalp with the oil. All the other products are leave in and I'll use the Kinky Curly leave in conditioner with one of the gels, but not all of the gels at once. I can wear the curl keeper alone or with a leave in conditioner. I don't usually use gel with the curl keeper.